The tic marks of time’s passage are innately hilarious.
The suppression of information regarding my age may increase vitality.
I have whimsical grandchildren.
Nothing says birthday like decapitated washboard abs.
Eleven lines of creative cruelty are negated by one line of vapid kindness.
Forgetting a loved one’s birthday is an opportunity for spunkiness.
The greatest thing an old person can be is a good sport.
An electronic greeting card is somehow more considerate than a link to a website.
On my birthday day, sex is owed me.
On my birthday, public nudity is sanctioned by law and will not result in my immediate arrest.
I will live forever.
