Baby… Shut Up

Introducing the first of 16 hit singles from the forthcoming “GRC: The Best of Impov”. Some have contested the single, assuming its prominent track placement and first single status betray spousal motivations. However, we at GRC Records held dozens of focus groups before coming to the decision. It’s what we do. You think we aren’t professional, dissenters? LAY OFF. But for the rest of our fans who only assume the very best about us, enjoy the song.

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7 thoughts on “Baby… Shut Up

  1. Asher Harrison Lemdiggity says:

    As an impressionable baby, I find this take on relationships quite influential. Although I was a bit put off by the title, the narratives in the verses are as enlightening as anything on PBS (from what I’ve heard from people who understand television). If I could control my appendages, I’d give this record two thumbs up.

  2. Asher Harrison Lemdiggity says:

    Note to the haters: it’s true that I wasn’t even born when this was first recorded, but I’ve been listening to it for almost my whole life. It’s almost all I know. That’s how I know it’s so good.

  3. Hello boys. Thought your viewers might find this interesting. Next time I suggest you keep a closer watch on your memos, boys.

    August 22, 2007

    Team,

    Kudos to the marketing department for their recent successes in “catching” week-old infants for the GRC Family. As Freud and teletubbies have shown, infancy is a crucial period in a person’s development. This has huge implications in the global marketplace. Did you know that by the age of three months, the average person has already decided which is his or her cola of choice? Three months!

    Lets be frank, here: We are running a business. Our constituency expects us to put personal morals and ethics aside and focus on the BOTTOM LINE. For this reason, we are marketing “Baby… Shut Up,” the first single on GRC Record’s highly anticipated improv album, exclusively towards newborn babies.

    Some in accounting raised a fair question: How does a song about chastising a romantic partner have anything to do with infants? Well, for starters, it’s never too early to give kids relationship advice. Better that they learn this stuff from us than from Skinemax and the like.

    However, on a more literal level, the chorus of the song promotes infant quietude. No doubt you all know the words: “Baby, shut up / you need to learn how to be in a relationship.” In this new context, the words apply to the baby’s relationship to mankind: don’t cry so damn much. As for the verses—Well, to be honest, I don’t listen to the verses in songs, I just talk or write an email or make 5k for our investors and then sing along when the chorus rolls around.

    We’ve struck a distribution deal with most of the major hospitals to sell “GRC: The Best of Improv” in maternity wards across the nation! In addition, the doctors themselves will push the album on parents as a “newborn package,” the implication being that you are an awful parent unless you buy the album for your kids.

    I guess what I’m saying is: if there was ever a time to buy more stock in GRC, it’s now. We’re taking this thing into the stratosphere.

    Gabe Durham
    CEO, Gather Round Records

  4. Thomas says:

    Oh snap. This does not look good. Has anyone told Gabe yet?

  5. Darnell says:

    I won’t be the one to tell him. Holla.

  6. Major Fan! says:

    The real question is, how do you take so much perfect material and pick ANY best of? Isn’t it all perfect, thus making “best” an unusable term? In other words, if all is “best,” could you not have just randomly picked any of the episodes to construct this disc? It sounds like “SAMPLER of all time greatest show in the history of all time” would be a more apt title. Or you could just put the entire episode with the RD on as a best of…because it was the best. He is so awesome. I wish I could just shake his friendly hands. What a benevolent, beautiful human being.

  7. Anonymous says:

    Good point, listener, though a bit of a tangent about the RD episode. In fact, if you listen closely, the disc is pretty much comprised of 2 episodes. Anything musical made it on there. I would have searched for more gems, but I’d already found more than enough.

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