Everybody Wins (new version)

guitar 

A country song…with chords! Now the whole family can gather round while pop strums using the few chords he still remembers. Capo 3 for low Johnny Cash-style singing.

G        
I seen my elders at the slots
C                            G
A glaze upon their faces,
I seen a husky fellow shot
O’er dusty beer-stained aces.
I seen a healthy romance broke
on a children’s game of war
D
I seen a lady get a stroke
C                       G
Upon the bingo floor.
The Vegas nights are quite a show
I best not be begrudging
The sin-struck glow’s enough
to keep e’en Ol’ Peter from judging
But while you carpe noche
Heed this and never doubt:
A loser among winners is
A loser down and out.

G
You may pit reds versus blacks
C                         G
On hasty roulette spins
F                                              D
My crew, we’ll stick to craps where everybody loses…
G                             C                         G                                 D
Or everybody wins, everybody wins, everybody wins.

I knew a pudgy whelp
With his belly full of stuffing.
The first words that he spoke:
“Pop, ya scratch your neck when bluffing.”
This card shark with a knack for hold ‘em
Weekly milked his friends
Till they flopped him in the river
At the turn he met his end.

A puny man sips his wine
Stares at the Keno screen
The numbers all in line
Yet his victory goes unseen.
Me, I never cared from whence
The lonely people came
I tell em, “Boy, you got no sense,
You picked a lonely game.”

I’m no fan-tan of your pai-gow,
Like your ancestor defends
My crew, we’ll stick to craps where everybody loses…
or everybody wins, everybody wins, everybody wins.

One night we were shooting clean
Making green on easy eights
The dealer’s name was Loose-Deuce Nina
The stickman, Boxcar Jake
The house was losing big, it’s true
But who was gonna blame us
We won enough come bets that night
Not even Nina could tame us.

You’ll buy a stack of blackjack books
Destined for garbage bins
My crew, we’ll stick to craps where everybody loses…
or everybody wins, everybody wins, everybody wins.

Another time after each point
There were sevens coming hot
My boys, we learned the hard way:
Our night it was not.
A smoking drifter joined us
Won a sum on the “don’t pass”
We tipped our hats congrats
And then we kindly kicked his ass.

You’ll find us front pew Sundays
Confessing all our sins
Come Saturday night we’re back where everybody loses…
G                             C                         G                                 D
or everybody wins, everybody wins, everybody wins, everybody wins
G                        C                         G                          D                     G.
everybody wins, everybody wins, everybody wins.

Tagged

4 thoughts on “Everybody Wins (new version)

  1. Carefree Dad says:

    Now that I’ve got the chords down, I can impress my kids with this greedy, violent song! Thanks, GRC.

  2. Gabe says:

    No problem, Carefree Dad. Thanks for gathering. And can I just say that it’s a pleasure to have a “cool parent” visit the site? It is.

  3. Carefree Dad says:

    I let my son’s friends come over to drink on the weekends. At least this way I know those pre-teen hellions aren’t getting into too much trouble.

  4. The Other Side says:

    Hi! I am a long time listener, first time caller, and I’ve got to say that the devil is in my stereo. He creeps under the disguise of Gather Round Children

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